I went to the gym today, I do every Sunday and feel guilty that I only go once per week. When I’m there it feels great. I work from home, so essentially my home is where I eat, take care of my three kids, sleep and miraculously in the midst of everything: work. I have a lot going on and when I am at the gym, I feel I am giving something back to myself, my body. But that’s not the best part of what happened today. I read a super article about called “Take a Load Off” by Martha Beck. At first glance I was like “Okay here we go: I know!! Eat well, excercise daily, take your vitamins, hang out with ONLY positive people, yeah yeah yeah. Funny enough it wasn’t and this article actually turned my day around. Here is what I took away from it:
1. What’s on your plate: This was brilliant! Martha explains that instead of fighting the to do list, why not just accept that part of being alive is doing stuff! I am always trying to finish the to-do-list and feel that I am in this race to FINISH IT! She says “To stop worrying about something, simply direct your attention toward something else. For example: What if an elk walked into the room right now?” I literally laughed out loud when I thought of that. It worked. 🙂
2. Your children: I have been running away from my kids lately. If they are playing in a room, I let them have fun, but don’t join them, rather just close whatever door I can find, and fold laundry or try to type an email. They are at an age now where their noise is loud and continuous. Yes, I know they are kids, which is why I try to ‘shut myself out’ at least for half the day. After reading this article, it helped change my thoughts to a new perspective. Martha spoke about worrying about our kids and she learned that we don’t actually have much control over the way our kids turn out. “Genes do a lot of the deciding and the owner of those genes does most of the rest. Either way, people blossom when we love them, not when we worry about them.” In my case I didn’t feel I was worried so much but rather not really loving them as kids when they made noise. When they were sleeping, or studying or playing a board game, they are just great! But it doesn’t work that way, I realized while reading that I have to choose my kids, for what they are and what they are not.
3.What you own: This one was big for me. The house has to be clean, and everything needs to be in its place. I’ll admit, it drives me nuts when things are untidy. I’ve tried so many times to just ‘not look’ but it doesn’t work. My husband isn’t the greatest help and thinks that Mary Poppins herself wouldn’t satisfy my clean -the -house needs. Martha gave some pretty cool advise here which got me thinking: “If you’d rather live surrounded by pristine objects than by the traces of happy memories, stay focused on tangible things. Otherwise, stop fixating on stuff you can touch and start caring about stuff that touches you.” LOVE IT.
4.Your account balance: This is big one. I spend everything I earn. I love going out to eat, having fun on the weekend with the family and and and! There is no payoff here. I read this book called “Screw It,Just Do It!” by Richard Branson (my idol) and he mentioned that if the main reason you are going to work is to make a lot of money: it’s not going to work. Have fun and money will come. Easier said than done buddy but Martha’s article was right there with me today: “I proactively pushed aside worry as I worked. Did I make money sooner because I stopped worrying? I don’t think so. Did I enjoy my life more from that moment on, regardless of how much I had in the bank? Abso-freaking’lutely. Go about your business, whatever it is, with full energy. And drop the worry. Watch how much stronger your moneymakeing skills become when you’re not dragging around a hefty load of anxiety.”
Here’s to trying Martha! Let me know if you enjoyed this article and what you took away from it today.
-Nadia;37 Golden Goose Learning Centre Parent